i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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