Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
