Your tits are I can't wait for
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Randomize
