Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
