i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
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