I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Come see our sink grown plant.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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