just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
