i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
