Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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