You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
