You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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