I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
