Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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