I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
