The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
