He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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