he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize