would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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