i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
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