whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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