If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
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