My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
there was a trapeze. enough said
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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