He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize