He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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