he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
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