I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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