god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
