i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
