There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Randomize
