Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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