I'm really into asian looking animals
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
