If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
