i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
