i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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