Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
