that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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