I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
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