He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
