There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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