It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
