Having a random hookup so left but love u
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize