I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
