I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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