Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Randomize