other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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