I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Blood and glitter go together right?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
