the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
I wannas sexs uuuuu
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Randomize
