is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
