i jhust puked up my retainher.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
It's just like the Real World with babies
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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