Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize