I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
