my mouth tastes like poor choices
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Randomize
